Mattering by Jennifer Breheny Wallace

Jennifer Wallace’s Mattering feels like it’s turned up at exactly the right moment. If you’ve been feeling worn out, disconnected, or oddly adrift, this book puts language around that experience without making it sound like you’re failing. We’re living through a hidden epidemic, one that’s reshaping our mental health and our daily lives, says Jennifer. From overwhelmed parents to isolated retirees, many people feel that they don’t matter; they’re unseen, unneeded or easily replaced. 

Jennifer’s key point is simple: "Mattering” is a basic human need. It’s the sense that we’re valued, and that we have something to contribute. When we don’t get that, consistently, it can take a toll.

What I appreciated most about Mattering  is how readable it is. Jennifer expertly blends research with stories of real people who are running on empty, caring for others, coping with grief, or trying to steady themselves through major life changes. 

For example, there’s the story of a family dry-cleaning business that offered free dry cleaning to those out of work, during the pandemic, so they could turn up dressed smartly for job interviews. Then there’s a local councillor who created a ‘fix it’ website, so residents could post photos of potholes, signs to be fixed and street lights to be repaired. There’s also Peggy who regularly cooks breakfast for her grandson and his friends. When he tragically dies in a car accident, the breakfast club continues, not just for the good food but because these kids feel noticed and listened to by someone who isn’t a parent or teacher. These are the kinds of everyday actions that quietly restore someone’s sense of place in the world.

There’s also a useful chapter on mattering at work, including what it looks like to nurture employee mental health in practical ways. Jennifer explains the “mattering core”: noticing your impact, being relied on without being overloaded, feeling prioritised and being truly known. These aren’t grand gestures. They’re small, doable shifts that can change how a workplace feels, how a family functions, and how we show up for each other. You’ll likely finish the book feeling seen and with a few clear ideas you’ll want to try straight away.

Follow Jennifer Breheny Wallace online.

Reviewer: Andrea Molloy

HarperCollins